What is Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)?
- Claudia Wolf
- Feb 6
- 3 min read
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) is a term used to describe an intense emotional reaction to perceived or actual rejection, criticism, or judgement. It is frequently reported among people with ADHD and other forms of neurodivergence. Although research is still emerging, clinical experience and self-report suggest it is both widespread and impactful.
RSD can influence personal relationships, workplace interactions, and creative or professional expression. It can present as spiralling thoughts, emotional pain, withdrawal, avoidance, or self-criticism.
My Own Experience with RSD
Running a therapy practice involves a great deal of visibility. For me, posting on social media or promoting my programs can activate RSD quickly. My mind may generate stories such as:
• People will think I am only here to sell
• My colleagues must think I am underqualified
• Maybe I am thought to be a problem child in my colleague group
• If I post too much, people will be annoyed
These thoughts feel real in the moment. This is the hallmark of RSD: it blends past hurt with present-day ambiguity. As an auDHD woman, I also find it shows up socially:
"I’m too much"
"I don’t fit in so I should avoid all social contexts"
"My friends probably think I talk too much about myself or are tired of me"
RSD goes beyond normal worries and doubts. It is often a physically painful sensation felt in the body that dictates our actions and responses (like withdrawal), and quickly leads to emotional or thought-based spirals.
Our brains may collect evidence or recall any social situation that went a bit awry, to support the emotional space we are experiencing.
What Helps
Some cognitive strategies are useful here- I personally like elements of Acceptance Commitment Therapy such as unhooking (opens YouTube link) from thoughts and feelings "I notice I am having the thought that my friends hate me…" feels far removed from "my friends hate me". This is a mindfulness based approach that helps you 'sit with' rather than fight difficult thoughts or feelings.
Parts work also offers a meaningful way of responding. Instead of challenging the thoughts directly, you can turn towards the part that is distressed, and ask what it needs. Perhaps one key experience of actual or perceived rejection as a neurodivergent person has shaped the current experience, and needs some reassurance and compassion that the present moment is safer and not the same. This creates distance, compassion, time-orientation and grounding.
I also use a mantra such as ‘it doesn’t need to be perfect- it needs to be done’. This helps me operate in online spaces, training contexts, or my wellbeing workshops where a paralysing fear of imperfection (and thus judgement from others) will get in the way of me showing up as an authentic human and imparting the knowledge that I know others appreciate and find useful.
I also like to remind myself- I’m not for everyone, but I am a great match for others.
Supportive self-talk, emotional regulation skills, and consistent self-care also play a role. Consulting with peers and mentors (even on social media or through memes!) helps normalise the experience.
If RSD is familiar to you, you are not alone. Therapy can be a useful tool to work through the physical and emotional pain of RSD, especially as a neurodivergent person who has spent a lifetime feeling they don’t quite fit in. Most importantly, developing an awareness of what is going on for you, and learning some simple strategies to unhook from painful thoughts and feelings, can help stop the ‘spiral’ in its tracks.
Want to learn more?
Click Here for information about Parts Work
Here for information about my neuro-affirming EMDR Immersions program
and here for YouTube Demonstrations- watch demos of my Resource Therapy (advanced parts work) and EMDR therapy sessions + more
Claudia Wolf | AMHSW | Accredited EMDR | Advanced Clinical Resource Therapist & Trainer
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This blog is not a replacement for therapy or therapy training, and is for entertainment and educational purposes only. If these themes bring up any distress for you, please seek formal support.
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